


It's A Lot

by shadowofz



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Heart-to-Heart, M/M, S12E02 coda, Season 12 spoilers, because I'm frustrated Cas wasn't in the end of the episode, so I fixed it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-10-21
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:27:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8338105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowofz/pseuds/shadowofz
Summary: S12E02 Coda“I don’t know her,” Dean blurts out, surprising himself by breaking the silence. “I mean, I’ve got memories- that’s more than what Sammy’s got- but… I don’t know her.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written coda before but I couldn't help it. I wanted Cas to be in that end-of-the-episode montage so bad. So, poof, I made it so.

Dean jumps slightly when Castiel’s quiet footsteps come around the kitchen island. Cas’s mouth is open like he’s about to ask something- but stops when his eyes drift down to the empty beer bottles and photographs strewn across Dean’s lap.

Dean’s instinct is to gather up all of the photographs and stuff them out of sight- but he doesn’t. Maybe it’s because he figures Cas will simply leave and let him sulk in peace, or maybe it’s just because it’s Cas.

Regardless, he feels petty and embarrassed at getting caught on the kitchen floor hidden away from everyone. He suddenly becomes very focused on the label on his beer bottle.

The longer Cas just stands there staring, the deeper of a scowl and pout Dean’s lips curl into. If Cas doesn’t leave or say something Dean’s going to-

But Cas does neither. Cas instead, quietly, steps into Dean’s kitchen hideaway and sits against the cabinets across from him.

Dean looks up to the angel now- but Cas has his eyes carefully closed. Dean can feel his scowl drop and fade into a small grin.

If Sam had found him, he’d be trying to talk him into talking by now.

If Mary had found him- well, Dean’s not entirely sure what she would have done.

He’s glad it was Cas.

They sit there in the quiet for a while. Cas never opens his eyes as he sits in silent peace, his hands folded neatly in his lap- his legs outstretched in a way that mirrors Dean’s own. Dean takes a few more draws from his beer and continues to look at the photographs in his hand- of his younger self and Mary, of his mom.

“I don’t know her,” Dean blurts out, surprising himself by breaking the silence.

His eyes flick to Cas, who’s eyes are open now. He’s watching in that nonjudgmental way that only Cas can manage, waiting patiently for Dean to continue.

Dean swallows thickly. “I don’t know her,” he repeats roughly. “I mean, I’ve got memories- that’s more than what Sammy’s got- but… I don’t know her.”

The silence settles again while the words hang. Dean continues to stare at Mary’s worn photo while he waits for Cas to tell him not to make it more complicated than it is.

After a thoughtful moment, however, Cas says, “You know she loves you.”

Dean takes a shaky breath in, switching his stare from Mary to his own, four-year-old, cheeky face.

“And not just the you she knew,” Cas confirms, as though he could tell what Dean was thinking.

Dean looks up at Cas again, and when their eyes catch- they don’t let go.

“She loved you then, and she loves you now. That’s enough to know for now. The rest will come.” His voice is quiet and soft, though it still rumbles with the celestial depth and surety that Cas always has.

Dean’s jaw clenches as he finally looks away and stares back at the photograph he’s kept all these years. “It’s a lot.”

“I know, Dean.”

Cas shifts so that his knee bumps into Dean’s. Dean looks back up- breath caught in his throat- but finds Cas’s eyes are peacefully closed again.

A faint grin follows the flush in Dean’s cheeks as Dean shifts too, touching Cas’s knee with his own just a little firmer, a little surer.

And Mary, just out of view in the doorway, grins with a little sadness and a whole lot of warmth in her chest. It seems an angel really is watching over her Dean after all.


End file.
